They lied!

Well, they lied!

Mum and dad didn’t give me a ride on the big red and white boat for my birthday (27th of March) after all, so our big trip around Australia still hasn’t happened yet. They said something about the house not selling, or some other silly excuse, so I’m feeling a bit pooed off. They had to cancel their tickets and we’re not going until July. Ripped off!

We went away for a little holiday to the big island north of Tasmania (while dad learned about selling the best caravans in the whole world). The Runt and I went too, so we have done some travelling, thank goodness, ’cause it was almost getting boring living here, by the beach all the time. I had a great time.  We stayed in a caravan park and went to some really exciting shows. One had lots of cows and plows, the other one had lots and lots of caravans. Dad was selling caravans like the one we are buying (when the house is sold… that is), and loads of people said they were the nicest caravans at the whole show! They are called Cell Caravans, and if you want a caravan, you really should buy one of these… from my dad, ’cause if you do, he gets some pocket money from a nice man with a beard like my dad’s.

Something else has happened to me that I was really sad about for just a little while, but now I am really happy again. Mum and dad decided that The Runt – I suppose I should call her Izzy for one last time – got stressed again on our little holiday. When she gets stressed, she gets all nasty and wants to bite everyone. She was doing it on our big trip to WA last year, but she got much better again once we came home and lived in our own house. But when we went away last month, she started getting all stupid about being near strangers and she didn’t want to play with other dogs, and stuff (what an idiot! I reckon that’s the best bit about travelling!). Mum says that some dogs, just like some humans, don’t like to travel alot. She was getting really crabby and unpredictable – with me, with human children, and just about everyone, really. Mum reckons Izzy was not coping with all the changes in her life that come with being on the road, so they decided she would be happier living with some friends of ours who don’t travel around Australia like we do.

Her new humans have a small farm near Hobart and a house on the beach near Swansea. We haven’t visited her, but our mums talk on the phone and apparently The Runt is being perfect! Ha! I doubt it!!! But her new humans say she is ‘faultlessly obedient’ (whatever that means), and ‘she entertains the whole family with her ball antics’… phooey, they weren’t that good, were they? They sent a photo of The Runt playing on their beach at Easter and even I have to admit she looked super happy. Mum and dad reckon she is enjoying being an only child, and, I have to say, so am I!!!!

I miss her a bit, but don’t tell anyone.

Anyway, now that dad will be selling caravans during our travels, we will have lots of our costs paid by the nice man with the beard that owns the Cell Caravans company. This means we can stay in posh caravan parks and have our fuel paid while we explore Queensland. Yay! That means mum and dad will be able to buy me more toys and biscuits!!

The first caravan show we have to be ready for is on The Gold Coast in late July, so if the house doesn’t sell soon… well, life could get awkward. If the house doesn’t sell, we can’t buy our fancy new caravan, and if we don’t have the fancy new caravan, we won’t have a little house to tow up to Queensland to sell other fancy caravans.  Mum and dad have their fingers and toes crossed and I have tied pretend knots in my tail (my fingers and toes aren’t long enough to cross, so we puppies tie knots in out tails, instead), hoping to make a nice person come and visit and ask us if they can buy our house.

We spent some time at our block of land in Stanley last month and it was fantastic fun. Mum and dad had coffee with their new  friends and I played with Max, who keeps those people safe. He is a large, fat Rottweiler and although we were a bit cautious of each other at first, mum made sure we took our time getting to know each other, so it was all good. He’s ancient, and isn’t much fun – he won’t run fast enough to chase me – but at least he is a dog! Next time we visit Stanley, we are all going to go for a romp together on the beach and that’s really cool!

On the block, we met a man who rides in a massive metal monster that digs up the ground. He is going to make a driveway and take out some old tree stumps. Then another man is coming with a big, round truck that wees cement and he’s going to make a slab (why dad wants a case of beer made at Stanley I don’t know, but that’s what the man is going to do). Then another man is coming with lots of little machines and tin to build us a big shed – much bigger than the one in my back yard in Hobart.

Mum and dad are very excited about all these men visiting with their machines. They say all our toys are going to be stored there while we sell caravans in Queensland. I hope they let me take some toys with me. I always need lots of toys to play with on the road, to keep me happy when I am imprisoned while they go off touring and visiting the bushy places, where small critters live, so I am not allowed to go there.

The huge red and white boat, that will take us across the water to the big island that has Queensland in it, is booked for early July, now. So this means I still have 57 sleeps! It’s ridiculous, because this is what I told you last time!

I wish someone would buy our house.

Only 57 sleeps to go…… (I can’t wait, I can’t wait, I can’t wait)….

Until next time, be sure to eat your biscuits and pee on as many shrubs as possible to spread the word!






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